Chosson hunt continues
Here's the down-and-dirty update:
After I got rid of Eeyore, I somehow was dumped by the New Yorker. Neither I nor M.H. quite knows what happened. I sent him a very harmless email and never heard from him again. Maybe he just got 'busy' (for you non-frummies, it means perhaps he's dating someone else). Fine.
Then, M.H. found another round of guys on SYAS. They all sound sweet, but one stood out. He's from the Northwest - he moved out there so he could be closer to outdoorsy pursuits. He writes poetry and loves his garden. He likes to travel and get to know the people who live there. My soulmate? Quite possibly.
So, what's the hangup? I accepted the suggestion immediately figuring that M.H. had run it by him before mentioning it to me (as she usually does). When I logged on tonight, I saw that the match had only been approved by me (it would say 'approved by both' if he had gotten it first). Disclaimer: this is not an indictment of M.H. She works very hard trying to get all of us lonely souls married off. I suspect that this guy has stipulated in his profile that he wants the woman to be asked first. Chaval for me.
Now, I'm steeling myself for the disappointment. I really don't think I've set my ideals too high. For all that I go on about what type of guy I want, I'm describing a mentsch. I'm a little hung up on not wanting to live in or near NYC, but other than that I just want a garden-variety nice, smart guy.
I have a friend who has been setting her sights a little high (if I can say so without throwing stones at my own glass house). She is as average looking as the rest of us, though she truly has a sparkling personality and is very warm and charming. Nevertheless, she persists in wanting to be set up with hunky doctors and lawyers. They always turn her down. It's hard to see her disappointed time after time, but I worry that saying something to her would cause irreversible damage to her self-esteem, to say nothing of our friendship. I'm 99% sure she doesn't read this blog, so I feel comfortable asking your opinion on this matter. To speak or not to speak?
posted by Sarah @ 22:15
3 comments
3 Comments:
If she wants to be set up with hunky doctors and lawyers and that is the most important thing to her, then let her, but a kind word to her that perhaps broaderning her horizons may be beneficial. If she is not affected by being turned down, then dont tell her, but a small dent in her self esteem may make her happier in the long run. I know that saying something like that can wreck a person (I know - unfortunatly I've done it) but if she is a good friend she will understand.
Good luck. To both of you.
Elster, dah-ling, I was not fishing for complements with my last post, but thank you all the same.
maybe she can have one or the other, a hunk or a doctor (doctors are over rated) but not both. Is she a professional? What are her aspirations. I happen to know 2 30+ ladies that have let many great guys pass through their fingers because they didnt have any letters after their name. Their loss. They are still alone.
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